Rough stuff

We have had some tough stuff here recently. Perrin my oldest has been struggling with school since about 1st grade. He has had a hard time understanding what is being taught. In Utah the teachers were very patient and he was able to get extra help. He was often removed from the class to get the extra help he needed. Still I was positive that he was just a little slow and he would eventually get it. Things would click and everything would work out. That was the way it was for me. I needed extra help until one day I understood what they wanted and poof my education took off from there. When we moved from Utah to Texas three big things happened. First, Perrin was now in 3rd grade. This is a pivotal year, school goes from mostly fun and games to real work. Second, the Texas schools required so much more from there students than Utah. And third, Perrin was dealing with leaving all of his friends and everything he new and loved. He was dropped into a very different place, everything changed for him except his family. Naturally with all of this Casey and I expected things to not go well with school and we were right. He almost did not pass 3rd grade. We had high hopes for 4th grade. We were all settled in to our home and community. Perrin has loads of friends and we worked very hard to have a great relationship with his teachers. He got a father's blessing before school started and we felt ready to take on the year. Less than one month in to the new school year I was meeting with his teachers because Perrin was struggling already. We began working through his homework one on one at home. We talked with him about how important it is to be focused at school and how a good education will take you far. We tried everything we could think of. We really worked with him. Just before Christmas we filled out a Connor’s report. This is a paper that asks questions to determine is someone has or potentially has ADD or ADHD. People have hinted for years that Perrin "might" have ADD or ADHD. It really bothered me. I grew up hearing stories about children who had ADD and were medicated and how bad it was, how doctors and parents are looking for an easy way out. Children are over medicated because parents and doctors don't want to do the work that is required of a good parent. I was so determined to be a good parent. "NO WAY was I going to medicate my child. I just needed to be more patient and he will catch on, " or so I thought. Just before Christmas we also bought Perrin a DSi and told him if he could get an A in math, his weakest subject, than he could have the DSi. He took this very seriously and asked his teacher to tutor him after school. He was putting in all of his effort and it was easy to see just watching him. We let thing play out. We continued working with him at home and he worked so hard at school. Now he began experiencing so much disappointment. He would come home from school with a report card so excited to look at it, all the while saying, "I know my grades are going up. I can feel it. I am giving 100%. Open it I can't wait to see how good I am doing." When we opened it what did we see? Oh no, his grades were all going down. Then I would hold Perry while he cried. It was a heart breaking time.Finally Perrin took a practice TAKS test. It is the standised testing for Texas. He scored a 31% on it. His teachers were so concerned and they got a hold of me and we got together. At that meeting Casey and I decided we needed to consider the idea that he may need to see a doctor. After the meeting we prayed and got an immediate answer. We needed to take him to a doctor. So that next Monday which happened to be the first day of spring break Casey took Perrin in to our family doctor. The doctor looked at the Connor's report, notes the teachers had written and some of his school work. She talked to Perrin and did some blood test. Then she determined that he needed to be on some medication for ADD.Casey and I felt good about this so I went out and bought it and he started taking it on Tuesday. He was so emotional the first few day. He cried a lot and wanted to be close to me all the time. It was so nice! But I knew he couldn't function that way and I knew that if he didn't improve we would have to take him back to the doctor and try again. By Thursday he was happy again and things were starting to go better and by Friday things were better than they had ever been before. It was the last day of spring break and I was letting the kids have a veg-out day. In the morning I was cleaning the house and after lunch Perrin told me how grateful he was that I was taking care of him and his sisters. He also told me he wanted to help by cleaning the toy room. I knew this was something that was hard for him. When I ask him to clean his room for example I give him a paper that says thing like, "pick up all the blue things, or put away all the shoes." If I don't than he just can't do it. Well I decided to let him try on his own. I checked on him after he had been at it for a half hour or so and I was going to help him finish but to my surprise he was doing great. He was even organizing! I let him finish on his own. He vacuumed, rolled up the rug, and swept. It was amazing!School has also improved. He is one of the first five done and does not miss very many. In the last two weeks his math grade has come up 10% All of his grades have improved. He even scored the highest in the class on a math assignment! Did the medication change his personality? Yes, he is no longer a frustrated and angry little guy. He is happier and more loving than he has ever been. He is more confident and out going. Being his mom has been more fun these last four weeks. I am so glad that we did this. It happened at the right time and was the right decision for our family.